Sex Therapy: FAQs

Everything you need to know about our service.

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If you’ve never been to sex therapy before, you probably have a lot of questions.

We have over 40 years’ experience supporting people with their sex lives, so we understand how to help.

Check out the most frequently asked questions people have about sex therapy below. You’re always welcome to call us and speak confidentially to an adviser if you’d like to ask about something that isn’t covered here.

Yes. In sex therapy, you’ll be given exercises to do at home, and there is quite an extensive assessment before you start.

Sex therapy focuses more on specific issues related to your sex life.

All of our sex therapists have completed special training at a postgraduate level.

Most of our sex therapists are also trained relationship therapists.

Sessions generally last for an hour.

You may want to do sessions weekly or less frequently, this depends on your preferences based on recommendations from your therapist.

In terms of seeing results, each individual and each couple are different. The amount of sessions you need to attend will depend on how you feel and what your therapist recommends.

We will help develop a programme that works best for you depending on your relationship and your issues.

No, your therapist will never touch you or your partner.

You will never be asked to take off your clothes or engage in sexual acts during therapy.

Sex therapy involves talking to a qualified practitioner, who may set you exercises to do at home that involve intimacy.

Discussing your sexual history will likely be helpful to your progress.

Everything you say during your sessions will remain confidential.

Discussing your history can give you and your therapist insight into where your issues may stem from.

Kinks and fetishes can be an important point of discussion.

If you believe kinks or fetishes are causing an issue with your sex life, we can help with that.

Your sex therapist will support you if kinks or fetishes are causing problems in your relationship.

Absolutely. We understand pornography can be an important part of sexual discovery, and we understand it can cause problems if there are compulsions or addictions.

Your initial consultation with your sex therapist can help you understand if sex therapy is the best place to deal with issues around pornography, or if you would be best referred to another service.

Sex therapy can certainly be beneficial if you come on your own.

However, if you’re in a relationship, it really is better to attend with your partner. Sometimes we find partners don’t attend initially but join after time.

Communication is important, and if you attend first, it may provide you with some ideas to take back to your partner for discussion. They may want to join your sessions later on.

Sex therapy can help you to engage with the pleasure of sex, when sexual contact may have meant something completely different to you in the past.

An experienced sex therapist will make a careful assessment about the timing of your therapy and discuss this with you. If you have already had some therapy for the sexual abuse, then this may be a good time to have sex therapy.

If, during the programme, memories of the abuse are triggered, then your sex therapist will talk this through with you and signpost you to appropriate support where needed.

This is a common problem very familiar to our sex therapists.

It can be difficult if you and your partner have different sex drives, or if one person wants sex more than the other.

Sex therapy can help you understand that it’s often not personal. We can help you and your partner find a solution that works for both of you.

Talking to somebody who is not in involved in your relationship can make a huge difference.

A sex therapist is impartial and may be able to help you see things that you can’t. Our sex therapists have knowledge, skills and experience in dealing with a wide range of issues.

It can make a huge difference being guided through your problems. You can also bring problems to your session if they arise after you begin therapy.

Yes, speaking to a therapist can help you understand if your issues are purely sexual or if there is something else going on in your relationship.

If your therapist feels couples counselling may be more beneficial to you, that’s a route we can help guide you down.

Sometimes it’s advisable to consult a doctor, in order to exclude potential underlying physical problems.

But if you choose to see us first, your sex therapist can help you understand where your problems lie and if seeing a medical professional is advisable.

For many of the people that see us, physical issues are part of the problem.

Physical issues can also cause psychological problems, which our sex therapists can help with.

We can help you build the confidence to talk openly about physical issues, which can relieve anxiety you have about them, and in turn improve your sex life.

Sometimes, painful sex can actually be caused by anxious thoughts and feelings.

Understanding these emotions can help, and talking to a sex therapist can relieve anxiety.

If we believe your problems may be physical, you might be advised to see a medical professional.

Sometimes they are and sometimes they aren’t. Erectile dysfunction can be related to anxiety. They can also be compounded by anxiety.

Sex therapy can help you communicate with your partner, if you have one, and create a shared understanding of what’s happening, so that it doesn’t become personal.

Yes, you certainly can.

We believe everybody has the right to the support they need. If you are having problems related to a disability, our sex therapists can help with that.

Yes, we are a fully-inclusive organisation and support people of all gender and sexual identities.

Your preferences or identity may be related to your issues. Our sex therapists are trained to deal with issues that exist outside of heterosexual relationships.

You can indicate a preference for the gender of your therapist.

However, please note that if you feel it is crucial, you may need to wait longer for a therapist of your preference to become available.


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Sex Therapy

Support for those facing issues in their sex life.